The Grammar Police, Part II (Putting the "mar" in "grammar")

as u reed this i am on the bus as i spoke of earlier i have chosen to right about grammer and the grammer popo and to raze awareness 4 the issue i have decided to post in poor grammer. (Congratulations, you have earned a period to finally end this sentence!) i hope your impressed.

so by the time u reed this as i sed ^ i have been on teh bus 4 4 hrs and am likely growing quit tiered.

gramer is relly not a touchy enuf subject. i men like people can use horrid grammer and spilling and no one cares even though it really is NOT that much more difficult to use proper grammar. LEARN TO WRITE.

Gah, that's enough of that silliness. Writing in poor grammar is harder for me than using proper spelling and grammar. It takes like 2 seconds of extra effort to make a text have proper grammar, and leads to easier interpretation on the other person's side, and does not lead to as much confusion (for instance, the infamous FML (fmylife.com) post in which a guy is flirting with a coworker and offers to take pictures and send them to her. She says "your nuts!" So, of course,  being the proper grammar connoisseur he was, he sent a picture of his nuts, when in fact she meant "you'RE nuts." If you meant it, say it. Such a bimbo. And by bimbo I mean the average (ab)user of poor grammar). This brings me to my haiku which I have yet to think of:

The grammar police
Needs to be an official
Division... of life


Yes, that's right, I said it. We need a grammar police. Not in our government, but in our daily lives. It is a self-appointed position, which really holds no power, but still helps to make the world a better place. What would be ideal is if the government granted the grammar police the power to take any grammar-abuser's phone, throw it on the ground (or floor) and stomp it into a million pieces. Because let's face it: If you can't spell out a two letter word, you don't deserve a cell phone.