Today is an absolutely beautiful Saturday afternoon. About an hour ago our female-only dorm residents filed out of the dorm for a fire alarm. You can tell it was the female only dorm because people actually responded to a noise at 11 AM. Were there a men's only dorm, the residents would probably be burned alive on a Saturday morning before 2 PM.
I have decided that each Saturday, I should change thing up. So here's my official unveiling of:
Sexual-Story-Saturday! By which I mean Limerick-Saturday, but that doesn't have as nice a ring to it. I have come to the conclusion that each and every Saturday I will post a limerick instead of a haiku. So here you go!
Oh there once was a woman from Crete
And oh so many a man she did meet
She lived in a hut
And kept the door shut
For her real home was between the sheets.
There you go. And look for a vlog post today or tomorrow maybe.
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Friday, November 6, 2009
NaSiWoShoStoMo
I look like an idiot. The weatherman said that it would be sunny today, and as a result I decided to bring my sunglasses with me, hanging from my neck. But, of course, the weatherman lied! It has been cloudy and gross all day, and here I am with my shades. You might ask "why don't you just take them off and put them in your bag?" My answer: that would be accepting defeat. I prefer to deny and defy defeat by carrying my sunglasses with me. That way the statement I send is "it's supposed to be sunny, and it damn well had better be sunny" as opposed to "it was supposed to be sunny, but it's not so I'm putting my sunglasses away."
Now that I got that out of the way, I had something to talk about, but I forgot. I really need to write down and/or tweet haikus as soon as I think of them. Here's something I randomly thought of just now.
One thing that a large number of people tend to do in November is the NaNoWriMo. The challenge is to write a 50,000 word novel in a month. That equates to a little less than 2000 words per day. There is no reward other than self-satisfaction and being able to accomplish something huge. Sadly, quantity is valued over quality though, and as a result- the novels are likely not very good from many people (no offense). It's still a large accomplish, but if you want to write a novel you should not need a competition to inspire you to do it, and you certainly shouldn't rush to finish it. John Updike, a professional writer (well, he's dead now), used to write 3 pages a day. For this competition, one would be writing more pages per day than someone who made his living writing. This is not to say that I'm against the competition, no- I just feel that if you are serious about writing a novel you should not need a competition as such. I would also like to suggest a competition for those who are not as Carpal-Tunnel-y inclined:
50,000 words?
Why not try to write for "Six
Word Short Story Month"?
That's right. I suggest that rather than writing a 50,000 word novel, you put that effort into writing a super epic, high-quality six-word short story. It would equate to writing about a letter every day or two. There would be such suspense to it: You sit down at your computer, and you have to choose. What will it be for today? A vowel? A consonant? Perhaps both?! (crazy talk, I know). This option is much more suitable for someone who favors quality over quantity, or who is lazy, or has a really short attention span. And trust me, when the month is through- you would probably be much more proud of an absolutely unmatchable short story than you would for 50,000 lukewarm words.
Now that I got that out of the way, I had something to talk about, but I forgot. I really need to write down and/or tweet haikus as soon as I think of them. Here's something I randomly thought of just now.
One thing that a large number of people tend to do in November is the NaNoWriMo. The challenge is to write a 50,000 word novel in a month. That equates to a little less than 2000 words per day. There is no reward other than self-satisfaction and being able to accomplish something huge. Sadly, quantity is valued over quality though, and as a result- the novels are likely not very good from many people (no offense). It's still a large accomplish, but if you want to write a novel you should not need a competition to inspire you to do it, and you certainly shouldn't rush to finish it. John Updike, a professional writer (well, he's dead now), used to write 3 pages a day. For this competition, one would be writing more pages per day than someone who made his living writing. This is not to say that I'm against the competition, no- I just feel that if you are serious about writing a novel you should not need a competition as such. I would also like to suggest a competition for those who are not as Carpal-Tunnel-y inclined:
50,000 words?
Why not try to write for "Six
Word Short Story Month"?
That's right. I suggest that rather than writing a 50,000 word novel, you put that effort into writing a super epic, high-quality six-word short story. It would equate to writing about a letter every day or two. There would be such suspense to it: You sit down at your computer, and you have to choose. What will it be for today? A vowel? A consonant? Perhaps both?! (crazy talk, I know). This option is much more suitable for someone who favors quality over quantity, or who is lazy, or has a really short attention span. And trust me, when the month is through- you would probably be much more proud of an absolutely unmatchable short story than you would for 50,000 lukewarm words.
Surefire Way to Make Research Papers More Fun (Exclamation Point)
I didn't really plan on a post, seeing as I gave you a song last night, but I figured that I would humor you with a short post.
Ripping apart those
Cocky scholars' arguments
Makes papers more fun
Yep, my paper that I'm working on right now for Survey of Jazz does just that. It's supposed to be a research paper, and you know you're doing a good job when your primary source is that scholar's book (as in "here he says A," "here he says B, which directly contradicts A, and therefore he's wrong and I'm right). It makes the entire writing experience significantly more enjoyable.
Now to go watch The Daily Show, which I have restarted as a morning tradition.
Ripping apart those
Cocky scholars' arguments
Makes papers more fun
Yep, my paper that I'm working on right now for Survey of Jazz does just that. It's supposed to be a research paper, and you know you're doing a good job when your primary source is that scholar's book (as in "here he says A," "here he says B, which directly contradicts A, and therefore he's wrong and I'm right). It makes the entire writing experience significantly more enjoyable.
Now to go watch The Daily Show, which I have restarted as a morning tradition.
Thursday, November 5, 2009
SONG: Ode to Facebook
New song is up!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6sg7RkF3VHQ
Hope you like it! Give it 5 stars, or else. Well, that's not so much a threat as it is a plea. So yes, please give me 5 stars (or I'll think of something to do that will likely be passive aggressive).
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6sg7RkF3VHQ
Hope you like it! Give it 5 stars, or else. Well, that's not so much a threat as it is a plea. So yes, please give me 5 stars (or I'll think of something to do that will likely be passive aggressive).
Self-Insulation
Remember yesterday when I said I would post a song? I LIED!
I was incredibly busy, and did not get back to my dorm until 11:15, at which point I collapsed into my bed and promptly fell asleep. By which I mean, that's what I would do in a dream world. Instead I ended up doing work until I couldn't keep my eyes open any longer (after about 10 minutes).
I'm going to base this post on a haiku I wrote yesterday afternoon (for my Twitter feed).
I can see my breath.
I should not be able to
See exposed leg skin.
I was out walking on the quad, and I realized that it was cold enough for me to see my own breath. Then someone walked by in a skirt. And I came to the conclusion that once people can see their own breath, it becomes socially unacceptable for them to wear skirts, shorts, and the likes- unless accompanied by tights, spandex, jeans (in Juno's case), sweatpants (in someone-who-by-some-weird-fluke-made-it-to-college's case), or some other covering that provides any degree of warmth. Or if you happen to be half-seal and have blubber or some other sort of self-insulating device. If not, you just look like a fool and/or tool (or potentially a sorority girl). And no, fishnets do not provide warmth.
That song will go up tonight, I swear!
I was incredibly busy, and did not get back to my dorm until 11:15, at which point I collapsed into my bed and promptly fell asleep. By which I mean, that's what I would do in a dream world. Instead I ended up doing work until I couldn't keep my eyes open any longer (after about 10 minutes).
I'm going to base this post on a haiku I wrote yesterday afternoon (for my Twitter feed).
I can see my breath.
I should not be able to
See exposed leg skin.
I was out walking on the quad, and I realized that it was cold enough for me to see my own breath. Then someone walked by in a skirt. And I came to the conclusion that once people can see their own breath, it becomes socially unacceptable for them to wear skirts, shorts, and the likes- unless accompanied by tights, spandex, jeans (in Juno's case), sweatpants (in someone-who-by-some-weird-fluke-made-it-to-college's case), or some other covering that provides any degree of warmth. Or if you happen to be half-seal and have blubber or some other sort of self-insulating device. If not, you just look like a fool and/or tool (or potentially a sorority girl). And no, fishnets do not provide warmth.
That song will go up tonight, I swear!
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Conversationalism's Key Components
Well. Today is finally thepre-enrollment day for freshmen. I have my whole schedule lined up, and hopefully I will get all that I plan to sign up for. I will share what I get with you.
Now what can I talk about. Yesterday was election day, but there's not much I'd like to say about that.
Maybe some more social commentary... Hmm, what to choose, what to choose.
The world would be
Less awkward if people were
Good at interaction
This statement may seem to be an over-generalization, but think about it. If people were all good conversationalists, there would not be nearly as many awkward pauses or awkward conversations or awkwardness in general. But that would require people to be not only outgoing, but also intelligent, 2 traits that are often mutually exclusive (sorry to any of the outgoing crowd I offended. Chances are that if you're reading this, you are at Cornell, in which case you're an exception to this rule. Unless you play hockey).
This topic resulted from me searching for a list of topics and coming across a how-to-be-a-good-conversationalist guide. I feel like that's about as effective a step-by-step guide as a "how-to-become-fluent-in-French" one would be. Because let's face it: Being a good conversationalist involves one thing in particular: Knowing English. And if you have what we call the "moron complex," or fall into those described in these posts, then you do not know English. Sorry, but this entire post reads as gibberish to you. og upi vsm trsf yjod, upi jsbr ypp ,ivh yo,r yp loo;.
I will be posting a song tonight maybe, so look out for it (gasp of anticipation!).
Now what can I talk about. Yesterday was election day, but there's not much I'd like to say about that.
Maybe some more social commentary... Hmm, what to choose, what to choose.
The world would be
Less awkward if people were
Good at interaction
This statement may seem to be an over-generalization, but think about it. If people were all good conversationalists, there would not be nearly as many awkward pauses or awkward conversations or awkwardness in general. But that would require people to be not only outgoing, but also intelligent, 2 traits that are often mutually exclusive (sorry to any of the outgoing crowd I offended. Chances are that if you're reading this, you are at Cornell, in which case you're an exception to this rule. Unless you play hockey).
This topic resulted from me searching for a list of topics and coming across a how-to-be-a-good-conversationalist guide. I feel like that's about as effective a step-by-step guide as a "how-to-become-fluent-in-French" one would be. Because let's face it: Being a good conversationalist involves one thing in particular: Knowing English. And if you have what we call the "moron complex," or fall into those described in these posts, then you do not know English. Sorry, but this entire post reads as gibberish to you. og upi vsm trsf yjod, upi jsbr ypp ,ivh yo,r yp loo;.
I will be posting a song tonight maybe, so look out for it (gasp of anticipation!).
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
"Brains" he rawred.
Well, today is Tuesday. It's a rather boring day. Although I guess that can be said about any day. Unless you live somewhere where people ride horses instead of bicycles and dinosaurs instead of shoes. Now there's an interesting question: if you used dinosaurs for transportation, and horses for other transportation, a lot of people would probably end up getting lost and/or getting places a lot faster. This is assuming that the dinosaur is not an herbivore, of course, though that is always a possibility. Also assuming that the horse cannot fly, which is also a possibility. And that just gave me a post idea: dinosaurs.
The other day, I was in a restaurant, and one of the menu items was "dinosaur chicken nuggets." If it wasn't on the "under 12 kids menu" I would have ordered it. Why? Because of the following:
One never outgrows
The idea of dinosaurs
No matter how old.
Dinosaurs own. I think we can all agree on that. Even if they are extinct. I'm sure that if they were alive today they would still own, and I would not be writing this. I wonder what would happen if a planet was solely inhabited by dinosaurs and zombies. Or zombie dinosaurs. That would be awesome. Although I'm sure they exist. By which I mean in some weird sci-fi fan fiction. Not in real life. Although if they did they would be able to eat brains pretty effectively. In one bite. Om nom. And the fact of the matter is if you could outgrow dinosaurs, you probably couldn't fit through doors (ba-da-boom! (that was the tom-tom -> cymbal sequence you hear at the end of bad jokes)).
The other day, I was in a restaurant, and one of the menu items was "dinosaur chicken nuggets." If it wasn't on the "under 12 kids menu" I would have ordered it. Why? Because of the following:
One never outgrows
The idea of dinosaurs
No matter how old.
Dinosaurs own. I think we can all agree on that. Even if they are extinct. I'm sure that if they were alive today they would still own, and I would not be writing this. I wonder what would happen if a planet was solely inhabited by dinosaurs and zombies. Or zombie dinosaurs. That would be awesome. Although I'm sure they exist. By which I mean in some weird sci-fi fan fiction. Not in real life. Although if they did they would be able to eat brains pretty effectively. In one bite. Om nom. And the fact of the matter is if you could outgrow dinosaurs, you probably couldn't fit through doors (ba-da-boom! (that was the tom-tom -> cymbal sequence you hear at the end of bad jokes)).
Monday, November 2, 2009
If It Can't Be Told In 6 Words, Shut Up And Don't Tell It.
Well, I hope you liked yesterday's video post. If you didn't watch it, watch it now. I will be posting another song later this week.
Today is Monday. I am especially upset by this Monday because I have a ton of work to do over the next week (you'd best expect only a post or so a day from me). I had something to talk about, but I forgot.
The past few minutes I've been writing six word short stories inspired by Ernest Hemingway's famous challenge. I will post a few of them (they're not all funny, I'll warn you. In fact a few are dark humor-ish):
She was ugly. He was drunk.
Childbirth. He never saw her naked.
Harry Potter found guilty of witchcraft (This is based on that post I made a while back)
He was a musician. She paid.
She was a republican. Didn't work out.
Zombie apocalypse: Racism not an issue.
I, of course, will still provide you with a haiku:
Six-word short stories
Are perfect for all those with
Short attention spans
Yep. If you don't have the ability to write or read a full short story, this is the type you write. It's incredibly difficult to do, but it's a lot easier to not lose your train of thought for halfway through (unless you have a really, really short attention span). Only having 6 words is hard in itself though. I usually do the same thing I do for an essay: write what comes to mind, and then whittle it down to 6 words (that was supposed to be a joke. Albeit, a bad joke, but still a joke. I like that word "albeit.").
Today is Monday. I am especially upset by this Monday because I have a ton of work to do over the next week (you'd best expect only a post or so a day from me). I had something to talk about, but I forgot.
The past few minutes I've been writing six word short stories inspired by Ernest Hemingway's famous challenge. I will post a few of them (they're not all funny, I'll warn you. In fact a few are dark humor-ish):
She was ugly. He was drunk.
Childbirth. He never saw her naked.
Harry Potter found guilty of witchcraft (This is based on that post I made a while back)
He was a musician. She paid.
She was a republican. Didn't work out.
Zombie apocalypse: Racism not an issue.
I, of course, will still provide you with a haiku:
Six-word short stories
Are perfect for all those with
Short attention spans
Yep. If you don't have the ability to write or read a full short story, this is the type you write. It's incredibly difficult to do, but it's a lot easier to not lose your train of thought for halfway through (unless you have a really, really short attention span). Only having 6 words is hard in itself though. I usually do the same thing I do for an essay: write what comes to mind, and then whittle it down to 6 words (that was supposed to be a joke. Albeit, a bad joke, but still a joke. I like that word "albeit.").
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Vlog Entry 2: Swearing and Children's Songs
Here's my 2nd vlog post. I kept it under 6 minutes this time! Enjoy. Be sure to give me 5 stars.
The description from Youtube:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5CujvXBFcc
The description from Youtube:
Here's the 2nd entry for my vlog. I have a few original children's songs that I "perform." Also, some talk about swearing at college, and a preview for next week's post.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5CujvXBFcc
"This is Halloween"
Well last night was Halloween. For any who did not see me, I went as the Minister of Silly Walks. We watched Sleepy Hollow and went to a boring graveyard (Graveyards in general just aren't very lively). And though we did not trick or treat, we had plenty of delicious candy. It was fun. Now what can I say about Halloween.
We played an incredibly fun game the whole night. We call it "count the sluts." It entails pointing out all of the people dressed up in slutty costumes and keeping a tally until the number gets to high for the engineers in the group to count. We lost track, so we won.
This brings me to my haiku.
When it's Halloween,
If you want a gentleman
Then don't dress slutty
By this I mean that slutty outfits are rather counterproductive. If a girl just wants to hookup, they're ok (they suit the person). However, if they want to find a good guy and form a nice relationship and/or friendship, they won't dress slutty. Here are some ideas for much more effective costumes: Pikachu, the house from Up, a zombie from one of many zombie things (be it Left 4 Dead or Pride and Prejudice and Zombies- a zombie Mr. Darcy would be good... although not a far cry from a normal Mr. Darcy), something not from Twilight, a non-corrupted (aka don't take after Emma Watson) Harry Potter character, etc. Any of those will help you get a good guy, I guarantee it. Keep that in mind next year when you start putting on your miniskirt and horrid excuse for a blouse.
I'm not even going to identify the title quote for you.
We played an incredibly fun game the whole night. We call it "count the sluts." It entails pointing out all of the people dressed up in slutty costumes and keeping a tally until the number gets to high for the engineers in the group to count. We lost track, so we won.
This brings me to my haiku.
When it's Halloween,
If you want a gentleman
Then don't dress slutty
By this I mean that slutty outfits are rather counterproductive. If a girl just wants to hookup, they're ok (they suit the person). However, if they want to find a good guy and form a nice relationship and/or friendship, they won't dress slutty. Here are some ideas for much more effective costumes: Pikachu, the house from Up, a zombie from one of many zombie things (be it Left 4 Dead or Pride and Prejudice and Zombies- a zombie Mr. Darcy would be good... although not a far cry from a normal Mr. Darcy), something not from Twilight, a non-corrupted (aka don't take after Emma Watson) Harry Potter character, etc. Any of those will help you get a good guy, I guarantee it. Keep that in mind next year when you start putting on your miniskirt and horrid excuse for a blouse.
I'm not even going to identify the title quote for you.
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