Squirrels? More Like Churls

Well, today is waffle Wednesday. Again. I suppose it's my way of coping with the horribly long Wednesdays I always endure.

Recently I've taken to discovering new musical artists. Don't ask why, it just sort of happens when I research for my Survey of Jazz papers. Two such artists, who I highly recommend are Melody Gardot and Kesang Marstrand. I already have both of Melody's CDs, and will likely order Kesang's soon (you can buy the physical CDs online, and for an average fee have her sign them).

Now, on to more serious business. Squirrels.

Recently, I've noticed that a lot of the squirrels here are becoming fat. Well, more fat than usual. This might be due to their storing up food for the winter, OR, maybe it's all a conspiracy.

Squirrels may seem dumb,
But that is precisely what
They want us to think.


That's right, I can tell. These creatures are actually fiendishly smart, and are plotting against us. You ever notice how squirrel-y the squirrels here are? I'll tell you: too squirrel-y. Looking so smug and happy with their acorns and tree climbing, hoping we'll never suspect. They're up to something, I'm telling you. The other day, as I walked to my dorm, their was a squirrel walking in the same direction, maybe 20 feet to my left. Every time I would stop, he would stop. When I continued, he would continue. I swear, he was mocking me. Squirrels? More like churls. These guys are fiendish beasts. They are definitely planning something. Now to figure out what....

In the meantime, I propose that more and more people get squirrel-proof bird feeders. It seems to be the one problem that the squirrels can't solve, and is highly entertaining as a result. It's like watching a drunk person try to solve a basic problem: hilarious, but if they knew that you were watching them they would not hesitate to end you.