Try and use good grammar

Alas! Today is Wednesday, and tomorrow I have my first (and second to last) final exam! This one is for my medieval romance class, which thus far has been all fun and games, by which I mean that all of the readings have been more or less enjoyable and the lectures have been nothing but entertaining (and that wasn't sarcastic). Now, however, I will be asked to identify twenty passages, saying where they're from, when they're from, what language they're in, what the context of the passage is within the book, and whether the author was a cat or dog person. (That last one was a joke... all of them were dog people). Luckily we get a review packet with 60 passages (the 20 will be chosen from these), and we only have about 7 books. But a difficult task nonetheless.

I'm not too worried about it though, I've already done a good two hours worth of studying. I'm more worried about all of my papers. And Christmas. But mainly my papers.

The other day, I discovered came across something rather interesting. I learned that the word "acronym" does not cover as much as I had though. There is another word, "initialism," which is what I had thought acronyms were. Acronyms are abbreviation types thingies where you are supposed to pronounce the name. For instance, NATO or CAT (Condescending A-Hole Terrestrial). Initialisms, on the other hand, include all acronyms, but also those things that you are not meant to pronounce, such as BBC or CCCLLLCTAA (Center for the Containment of Celebrities who have Lucrative, Lovely, Lives but who Cheat and Throw it All Away (Current Population: Tiger Woods)).

This is one of those little tidbits of information I will always need to correct people on now, something I never get tired of doing.

There are some things in
Our language that are just plain
Wrong. Work to right them.


I'm talking about all of those little grammatical errors, but not like "you're" and "your." I'm referencing the errors that have become so commonplace in our society that even some of the most avid grammar police don't think about them. My prime example of this is "try and." The sentence is "try to." To "try and" implies that you succeed, which defeats the purpose of the word "try" which has a sense of uncertainty. For instance, if you say "I'm gonna try and kill him tonight" it means that you are going to kill him tonight. And if you are going to kill him, why don't you just say that? You mean to say "I'm going to try to," which suggests that there is actually a chance of failure (even though you probably thought it all out and have that elaborate trap set up under his mattress and everything).

There are other little errors such as "who" vs "whom," but I shall not go into further rambling regarding this.

The Elements of Style

Well, I am anon returned to Cornell. I am most sad to depart from my dwelling, along with my family and friends- however, I am contented by the fact that I shall not have long ere I come home again. I'm not sure why I'm talking as I have been.

There's not much to speak of today, other than my departure- since that is all I can really think about. So rather than make an entire lengthy post, I will leave you with a haiku and a short thought based off of that haiku.

Strunk and E.B. White
Are now rolling in their graves
Because of Twilight


Really, I pity them. That is the curse of The Elements of Style, which forever afflicts them with the disease of poor grammar. I really want to see some grammar-fanatic or grammar-cult start someday, which would enforce good grammar with an iron ruler. They could start by making sure that Stephanie Meyer writes no more books. I've already discussed this, but we need a government-funded grammar police. Really. And anyone who wants a phone would need to take a short quiz on when to use "your" versus "you're."

Conversationalism's Key Components

Well. Today is finally thepre-enrollment day for freshmen. I have my whole schedule lined up, and hopefully I will get all that I plan to sign up for. I will share what I get with you.

Now what can I talk about. Yesterday was election day, but there's not much I'd like to say about that.

Maybe some more social commentary... Hmm, what to choose, what to choose.

The world would be
Less awkward if people were
Good at interaction


This statement may seem to be an over-generalization,  but think about it. If people were all good conversationalists, there would not be nearly as many awkward pauses or awkward conversations or awkwardness in general. But that would require people to be not only outgoing, but also intelligent, 2 traits that are often mutually exclusive (sorry to any of the outgoing crowd I offended. Chances are that if you're reading this, you are at Cornell, in which case you're an exception to this rule. Unless you play hockey).

This topic resulted from me searching for a list of topics and coming across a how-to-be-a-good-conversationalist guide. I feel like that's about as effective a step-by-step guide as a "how-to-become-fluent-in-French" one would be. Because let's face it: Being a good conversationalist involves one thing in particular: Knowing English. And if you have what we call the "moron complex," or fall into those described in these posts, then you do not know English. Sorry, but this entire post reads as gibberish to you. og upi vsm trsf yjod, upi jsbr ypp ,ivh yo,r yp loo;.

I will be posting a song tonight maybe, so look out for it (gasp of anticipation!).

The Grammar Police, Part II (Putting the "mar" in "grammar")

as u reed this i am on the bus as i spoke of earlier i have chosen to right about grammer and the grammer popo and to raze awareness 4 the issue i have decided to post in poor grammer. (Congratulations, you have earned a period to finally end this sentence!) i hope your impressed.

so by the time u reed this as i sed ^ i have been on teh bus 4 4 hrs and am likely growing quit tiered.

gramer is relly not a touchy enuf subject. i men like people can use horrid grammer and spilling and no one cares even though it really is NOT that much more difficult to use proper grammar. LEARN TO WRITE.

Gah, that's enough of that silliness. Writing in poor grammar is harder for me than using proper spelling and grammar. It takes like 2 seconds of extra effort to make a text have proper grammar, and leads to easier interpretation on the other person's side, and does not lead to as much confusion (for instance, the infamous FML (fmylife.com) post in which a guy is flirting with a coworker and offers to take pictures and send them to her. She says "your nuts!" So, of course,  being the proper grammar connoisseur he was, he sent a picture of his nuts, when in fact she meant "you'RE nuts." If you meant it, say it. Such a bimbo. And by bimbo I mean the average (ab)user of poor grammar). This brings me to my haiku which I have yet to think of:

The grammar police
Needs to be an official
Division... of life


Yes, that's right, I said it. We need a grammar police. Not in our government, but in our daily lives. It is a self-appointed position, which really holds no power, but still helps to make the world a better place. What would be ideal is if the government granted the grammar police the power to take any grammar-abuser's phone, throw it on the ground (or floor) and stomp it into a million pieces. Because let's face it: If you can't spell out a two letter word, you don't deserve a cell phone.

The Grammar Police

Well today marks the end of my "fall break" (which, after transportation, is shorter than the public school's "long weekend"). At 1:30, I board the 7 hour bus back to Ithaca, on which I plan to complete much work, which I doubt will actually happen (especially since I am bring back Monty Python's Meaning of Life, Spaceballs, a season of Monk, and a season of Scrubs). This lack of work is not due to the obvious fact that

Work simply cannot
Be completed when one is
Near a "Scrubs" box set


But rather, it is because, as mentioned in an earlier post, I have trouble working while in motion (or did I ramble on too long to get to that point?... no matter). By "in motion," I don't mean while running or something- that's easy for me; I mean while in a moving vehicle. It makes me nauseated. Oh, and fun fact about that! (don't worry it's not a vomit story). Proper grammar is "I am nauseated" not "I am nauseous." I don't recall where I heard that, but I still say nauseous nonetheless. Damned grammar police. Luckily, I have had very few run-ins with them, since I generally use grammar good, but I hear that they can often be incredibly brutal (Those of you who get "your" and "you're" mixed up had better watch your backs). But that's an entirely different post. Which I shall start writing.... now!