Well, the job search is a fail thus far. Who would have thought that it would be so hard to find a job, even in a retail environment. No luck with bookstores or restaurants, and still need to take a look at other places. I'm beginning to think that it would be easier to land a record deal than it would be to find a paying job.
Honestly, you'd think it'd be a little bit simpler for perfectly qualified college students to find jobs. But nope, the process is impossible. Every job I either don't fit or I'm overqualified for (I'm pretty sure that the number of Ivy League students that have set foot in Abercrombie is smaller than the number it takes to screw in a light bulb (1-5, depending on the version of the joke). No offense to Abercrombie, it's just the nature of the store).
What I find more ridiculous is the number of graduates who can't find jobs. Namely those in English, linguistics, sociology, or any other field I'm interested in. It's unfortunate really. All of these college-educated students doing jobs that could be performed by high school drop-outs. Which brings me to my haiku:
Something forgotten
About college is that it
Is an investment
The point of college is not to drink, party, or have fun. It's to learn- and importantly, it's also an investment. People spend hundreds of thousands of dollars to go to school because they expect to make it back. Because college is worth that much. But when college kids are busy working a cash register, using less-than middle school math skills, it just seems like such a waste. Maybe it's a hint that colleges need to lower tuition, or maybe it's just a sign that they need to do a better job helping their students to find jobs. Who knows. All I know is that I don't have a job, and need one.
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Friday, May 14, 2010
Cruel and unusual punishment
It's Friday! I don't really care though, because it's the summer and I lose track of the days- because that happens.
Today, I was at the dentists' office. Very fun. Lucky for me, I don't have any cavities and I don't need to get my wisdom teeth out. Good thing it took me a hundred-and-something dollar dentist trip to learn that.
People always complain about dentists being torture, but honestly I don't see it- maybe I've just been lucky. I mean, sure- it's annoying and sometimes painful, but it's really not that bad. Whatever sinks your boat, I suppose.
If people really find it that bad, here are my thoughts:
They need to get some
Dentists for Guantanamo,
That's good torture
Really, if you want new means of cruel and unusual punishment, look no further than dentists. The only real problem I can see is that it's hard to talk when their picking your teeth with metal. Maybe that's a good thing. It can allow all those hygienists to blabber away like they're hair dressers, while the person in the chair can say nothing. Now that's torture. I'm sure it wouldn't be long before a suspected terrorist would crack while under that kind of pressure. And if they don't, you can always threaten them with the bill.
On a side note, shouldn't psychologists be paid to get haircuts? Seems like hairdressers get paid to receive what people normally pay for.
Today, I was at the dentists' office. Very fun. Lucky for me, I don't have any cavities and I don't need to get my wisdom teeth out. Good thing it took me a hundred-and-something dollar dentist trip to learn that.
People always complain about dentists being torture, but honestly I don't see it- maybe I've just been lucky. I mean, sure- it's annoying and sometimes painful, but it's really not that bad. Whatever sinks your boat, I suppose.
If people really find it that bad, here are my thoughts:
They need to get some
Dentists for Guantanamo,
That's good torture
Really, if you want new means of cruel and unusual punishment, look no further than dentists. The only real problem I can see is that it's hard to talk when their picking your teeth with metal. Maybe that's a good thing. It can allow all those hygienists to blabber away like they're hair dressers, while the person in the chair can say nothing. Now that's torture. I'm sure it wouldn't be long before a suspected terrorist would crack while under that kind of pressure. And if they don't, you can always threaten them with the bill.
On a side note, shouldn't psychologists be paid to get haircuts? Seems like hairdressers get paid to receive what people normally pay for.
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Assholes
You may have noticed that I didn't put up a post yesterday. This is because I am no longer at school, and therefore don't have as regular hours to follow. I also don't have nearly as much to talk about since there's no college life to comment on. To that effect, I have decided to start updating my blog on a less regular basis for the summer (as opposed to just giving it up completely like I did for winter and spring breaks). So expect posts every few days. From now on I will be posting when I have something to talk about rather than posting to talk about anything I think of on the spot.
And I have something this time. I have come to a thought-provokingly profound conclusion regarding human nature: People are assholes. It's true, really. They lie, they cheat, they steal, they don't reply to you regarding jobs and internships (and don't even have the courtesy to say "sorry, you didn't get it), they give you false hope, they will insult you behind your back, stab you in the back if they feel like it, stab you in the front if they don't know you as well, or just act plain asshole-ish. In this post, I'm only really replying to one of those things: stealing.
Lots of people pirate. It's a pretty petty process, and quite common (I wanted to say "pretty common," but just had to get "pretty petty" in somewhere). They pirate music, movies, TV shows, games, pornography, the seven seas, and random software. I'm thinking of a special case.
I can understand
Pirating, but pirating
From charities? Douchebags.
In the news, I came across an article regarding a game bundle for sale online. Not only do proceeds from it go to charity, but customers can set their own price at which to buy. They can buy it at one cent, one dollar, or ten dollars. So for one measly penny, you can get a game- yet people go and pirate it? That's just plain low. It's like going up to a kid giving out free pamphlets, kicking him, and taking a pamphlet after he keels over. I just don't understand people. Sure, you don't have a credit card to put it on, but it's really not that hard to borrow one from a friend. I'm sure they'd be concerned about that one cent going to charity. Seriously, if you want the game, at least pay the one cent to get it. Or even better, pay 20 dollars, and feel good that you're compensating for over 2000 assholes (assuming they all were forced to pay 1 cent each).
Source: http://kotaku.com/5535744/
And I have something this time. I have come to a thought-provokingly profound conclusion regarding human nature: People are assholes. It's true, really. They lie, they cheat, they steal, they don't reply to you regarding jobs and internships (and don't even have the courtesy to say "sorry, you didn't get it), they give you false hope, they will insult you behind your back, stab you in the back if they feel like it, stab you in the front if they don't know you as well, or just act plain asshole-ish. In this post, I'm only really replying to one of those things: stealing.
Lots of people pirate. It's a pretty petty process, and quite common (I wanted to say "pretty common," but just had to get "pretty petty" in somewhere). They pirate music, movies, TV shows, games, pornography, the seven seas, and random software. I'm thinking of a special case.
I can understand
Pirating, but pirating
From charities? Douchebags.
In the news, I came across an article regarding a game bundle for sale online. Not only do proceeds from it go to charity, but customers can set their own price at which to buy. They can buy it at one cent, one dollar, or ten dollars. So for one measly penny, you can get a game- yet people go and pirate it? That's just plain low. It's like going up to a kid giving out free pamphlets, kicking him, and taking a pamphlet after he keels over. I just don't understand people. Sure, you don't have a credit card to put it on, but it's really not that hard to borrow one from a friend. I'm sure they'd be concerned about that one cent going to charity. Seriously, if you want the game, at least pay the one cent to get it. Or even better, pay 20 dollars, and feel good that you're compensating for over 2000 assholes (assuming they all were forced to pay 1 cent each).
Source: http://kotaku.com/5535744/
Monday, May 10, 2010
The morning after
Been working on my English essay all morning so I haven't had the proper time window in which to post.
Today, much like Mother's Day, is a special day. It's the day after Mother's Day. A transitional day really.
After mother's day,
The mother's role goes back to
The opposite one.
It's probably the biggest change from one day to another- even more so than Opposite Day. One day the kids are making mom breakfast, the next day she's doing it for them and cleaning up from the previous day's mess. They give her flowers, she has to take care of them. They do the shopping for her, she has to go and buy non high-fructose corn syrup based foods. And you get the point. While the intentions of Mother's Day are pure (except for Hallmark and all of the stores), the drawbacks of it can make it not necessarily worth the hassle. Or maybe they are. Who knows, I certainly won't since I will never (probably) be a mother.
Today, much like Mother's Day, is a special day. It's the day after Mother's Day. A transitional day really.
After mother's day,
The mother's role goes back to
The opposite one.
It's probably the biggest change from one day to another- even more so than Opposite Day. One day the kids are making mom breakfast, the next day she's doing it for them and cleaning up from the previous day's mess. They give her flowers, she has to take care of them. They do the shopping for her, she has to go and buy non high-fructose corn syrup based foods. And you get the point. While the intentions of Mother's Day are pure (except for Hallmark and all of the stores), the drawbacks of it can make it not necessarily worth the hassle. Or maybe they are. Who knows, I certainly won't since I will never (probably) be a mother.
Sunday, May 9, 2010
The ultimate gift
It's a very special day today. No, it's not National Water Bottle Appreciation day, or Warren G. Harding's birthday. It's not some obscure Jewish or Canadian holiday. It's not Memorial Day or Veteran's Day. Still don't know what today is? Well, if you haven't figured it out yet, you might want to run to the store. Today is Mother's Day! That's right, once again you need to buy your mom presents, and yes- we all now it's unfair because they get three holidays for presents a year and you only get two. But honestly, your present is where you are now, because without them you wouldn't be there. Unless you're living in a cardboard box, which is a pretty bad present.
Mother's Day is the day to show appreciation for all that your mom has done for you. And that means getting her flowers and a nice card. Why's that? Well, it's quite simple really:
Nothing says "thanks for
The past nineteen years full of
Support" like flowers
Really, it's true. In spite of the thousands of dollars she spends on you for food and college and presents and things and clothing and shelter- getting her the ultimate gift of a $6 bouquet of flowers and a $1 Far Side card really says thank you like nothing else. And if you don't even go that far to thank her, you're a disgrace to sons and daughters everywhere. Jerk.
Mother's Day is the day to show appreciation for all that your mom has done for you. And that means getting her flowers and a nice card. Why's that? Well, it's quite simple really:
Nothing says "thanks for
The past nineteen years full of
Support" like flowers
Really, it's true. In spite of the thousands of dollars she spends on you for food and college and presents and things and clothing and shelter- getting her the ultimate gift of a $6 bouquet of flowers and a $1 Far Side card really says thank you like nothing else. And if you don't even go that far to thank her, you're a disgrace to sons and daughters everywhere. Jerk.
Friday, May 7, 2010
National Zip-Lock Baggie Appreciation Day
It's Slope Day, and you know what means! Well... it means a number of things I guess.
First of all, don't be surprised if, when walking down your dorm's halls, you smell alcohol. It's a perfectly normal side effect the holiday. Especially in Donlon (that one dorm I talked about way back when... they're gonna be having a lot of ambulances today, I bet).
Second, it means that everyone is going to be gathered in one place. So if you happen to want to meet with someone for a study session on the slope, I'd recommend saving it for tomorrow (or the day after, depending on the efficiency of the cleanup).
Funny that we have
No usual holidays
But still have Slope Day
Most college campuses have some sort of day like Slope Day. It's just a common occurence. But most other schools also have Presidents' Day, Labor Day, Memorial Day, Martin Luther King Jr. Day, Yom Kippur, Passover, Boxing Day, National Zip-lock Baggie Appreciation Day, and many more. Yet we have none but the last of those. So why do we have Slope Day, if they're so set on ridding the school of holidays, puppies, unicorns, balloons, and happiness? Well, I think that it's simply something that they cannot eliminate. They can try their best to restrict access, to have classes, or to distract people from it- but really, if they were to eliminate it there would be a rebellion. Or a hunger strike. Or just a lot of people getting drunk with their stored-up alcohol. That sounds more like college.
First of all, don't be surprised if, when walking down your dorm's halls, you smell alcohol. It's a perfectly normal side effect the holiday. Especially in Donlon (that one dorm I talked about way back when... they're gonna be having a lot of ambulances today, I bet).
Second, it means that everyone is going to be gathered in one place. So if you happen to want to meet with someone for a study session on the slope, I'd recommend saving it for tomorrow (or the day after, depending on the efficiency of the cleanup).
Funny that we have
No usual holidays
But still have Slope Day
Most college campuses have some sort of day like Slope Day. It's just a common occurence. But most other schools also have Presidents' Day, Labor Day, Memorial Day, Martin Luther King Jr. Day, Yom Kippur, Passover, Boxing Day, National Zip-lock Baggie Appreciation Day, and many more. Yet we have none but the last of those. So why do we have Slope Day, if they're so set on ridding the school of holidays, puppies, unicorns, balloons, and happiness? Well, I think that it's simply something that they cannot eliminate. They can try their best to restrict access, to have classes, or to distract people from it- but really, if they were to eliminate it there would be a rebellion. Or a hunger strike. Or just a lot of people getting drunk with their stored-up alcohol. That sounds more like college.
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Ferris Bueller's Day Off x 20,000
Thursday! And it's the last day of classes.... well sort of. I suppose technically speaking, tomorrow is the last day of classes- but I don't think many people will be going tomorrow. If you're not a student here, the reason for that is Slope Day- a massive concert and celebration on the slope where absolutely nobody is drunk, nooooo.
Some professors are having class tomorrow, and either threatening that people go, or offering extra credit for those who do. Either is a dumb move though. Why? Well:
To have class on Slope
Day is sacrilegious and
Must be avoided
Yesterday, my linguistics professor told us that we would not formally be having class because he doesn't expect anyone to come. However, he said that for any linguistic-loving, etymology-enticed souls, he would be there.
My TA for my English class moved our discussion forward "in observance of Slope Day." That's how you need to do it. It is just plain blasphemy to have class on slope day, and it must be avoided at all times. It is your right to skip class if your teacher imposes on you. Of course, you also have the right to fail if your teacher's a douchebag, so it's probably smarter to go if you don't expect your teacher to be cooperative.
Some professors are having class tomorrow, and either threatening that people go, or offering extra credit for those who do. Either is a dumb move though. Why? Well:
To have class on Slope
Day is sacrilegious and
Must be avoided
Yesterday, my linguistics professor told us that we would not formally be having class because he doesn't expect anyone to come. However, he said that for any linguistic-loving, etymology-enticed souls, he would be there.
My TA for my English class moved our discussion forward "in observance of Slope Day." That's how you need to do it. It is just plain blasphemy to have class on slope day, and it must be avoided at all times. It is your right to skip class if your teacher imposes on you. Of course, you also have the right to fail if your teacher's a douchebag, so it's probably smarter to go if you don't expect your teacher to be cooperative.
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